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Post by snakeluver224 on Sept 4, 2008 17:41:30 GMT -6
Name:Sphix Age:3 years old Gender:Boy Clan: Unknown Herd: Unknown Mate:None Friends:None Family:None Species:River otter Physical Description: Sphix is a slightly bigger than average river otter, but only by three inches.He can swim fast, but on land he is clumsy and careless. Personality: He is nice and rarely mean.He is very playfull and never backs down from a game.But sometimes when he starts thinking about something, he'll bump into someone or something, or fall in the water. History: He was peacefull and carefull when he was young, but now he is carefree and even more peacefull.He had other two brothers, bt they went out on their own and were killed by two water snakes.So he grew up with his mom, for 11 months, until she got killed by a rattlesnake bite..But he never saw his dad.So now he lives alone. Role Play Sample: Sphix played in the water with a round rock, smooth rock.He splashed around in the water, trying to keep the rock from landing in the water.He then heard something.He stopped, the rock landed on a small area of land.He looked up, and then relized that the sound was a fish, trying to catch a dragon fly.He sighed then continued on playing.Sphix got tired and yawned.He set the rock down in the water, then he rested on large, smooth rock that was in the water.He then basked in the sun. Picture: media.photobucket.com/image/river%20otters/bridgette526/Tennessee%20Vacation/Tennessee%202008/P1000924.jpg?o=37
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Post by Shadowcat on Sept 5, 2008 9:19:04 GMT -6
Please make the topic the name of the character Change the herd to none Change the clan to either one of the five clans, neutral, or undecided Physical Description needs to be at least 50 words long (you have 26.) Try putting things like his fur color, eye color, etc. If the reader had never seen an otter before, how would you describe how he looks. Personality needs to be at least 100 words long (you have 37.) Try putting how he would react in certain situations, like if he's attacked, or teased, or if his friends are bullied, etc. History needs to be at least 100 words long (you have 66.) Try telling a bit more about his parents, where he lived, if he got along with his family, how he found Amanija or if he was born there, etc. Role Play Sample needs to be at least 200 words long (you have 97.) Try putting in some of his thoughts, maybe a bit of his description, his emotions, things he might see in the distance like birds flying in the sky, etc. If you need more help making the stuff longer, try looking at some of the accepted character profiles to get some ideas. If you still aren't sure what to put, let me know and I'll do my best to help.
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